


Faded Scars

by thecouchwitch



Category: Dragon Age II
Genre: M/M, minor sexy stuff, references to past sexual abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-18
Updated: 2016-02-18
Packaged: 2018-05-21 10:34:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,027
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6048301
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thecouchwitch/pseuds/thecouchwitch
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I just wanted to write some fluffy angst in which Fenris' past is treated with respect.<br/>Shoutout to Lingering-Nomad on tumblr for being an amazing beta :)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Faded Scars

“Wait.”

The hand tangled in Hawke's hair tightens, stopping him from getting closer to Fenris' erection. Hawke stopped as asked and looked up in confusion and surprise. Previously Fenris's face had been one of come-hither enthusiasm, but it had transformed into something more worrisome, unreadable to the untrained eye, but someone who knew him well would see the tightness of his jaw and the frowning crease between his brows.

“What's wrong?”

“Nothing. I suddenly feel ill at ease.”

Hawke promptly moved from his kneeling position to stand and reach for his underwear. His own erection felt incredibly heavy between his legs and objected to the fabric suddenly confining it. He felt deep disappointment; he had been enjoying their activity and they'd barely gotten started. Fenris had been enjoying it too, in fact he'd been the one to instigate it. His satisfaction could wait, however. Sometimes, Fenris had attempted to explain, when having sex a feeling akin to fear but not quite like it would wash over him, despite no part of the situation presenting any logical danger to either of them.

With his pants pulled on, he turned back to face the elf. Fenris was no longer leaning back on the edge of the mattress with one hand braced behind him, instead having moved up to the head of the bed and covered himself with the crimson silk dressing gown that had previously been dumped in a pile on the floor. It was Fenris's robe, sort of; it had been tailored and bought for Hawke, but whenever Fenris slept over he liked to wear it while they were lounging around. Fenris had been staying over more and more recently, so much so that Hawke had stopped thinking of the dressing gown as his own property. It was several sizes too large for the elf, and he looked small and vulnerable in it, more so at that moment with the way he was hugging his knees and looking at Hawke in concern, no doubt worried that the interruption had irritated him. Hawke gave a big smile to reassure him.

“So we're having a lazy sort of sleepover? ” He asked cheerfully. “Shall I fetch us some biscuits from downstairs?”

Fenris's expression relaxed and he gave a light chuckle. “Have some if you wish, but I had my fill at dinner.”

“Well, you're the guest, you pick the sleepover activity.” Hawke crawled onto the mattress and got under the covers. He laid back against the pillows, linking his hands behind his head leisurely. “We could have a pillow fight, or build a pillow fort. Something with pillows, a sweet old woman I did a favour for embroidered a cartload of them and sent them to me as thanks. I still haven't found a use for them all.”

“You could give some to Isabela.” Fenris joined him under the covers. “She seems like she would enjoy free pillows”

“Unlikely. She doesn't seem like a “cushions covered in cats playing with yarn” sort of woman. Though not all of them have cats, I can double check and see if any have boats on them.”

“I'm certain she'd love that.” The elf chuckled again and snuggled closer to his lover to rest his head on Hawke's broad chest. Hawke wrapped an arm around him and gave his shoulder a light squeeze, causing Fenris to lightly sigh and bury his face in the crook of Hawke's neck as though hiding from an unseen presence. “You're certain you're all right?”

“I will be. This disquiet will pass.”

“And you're certain I didn't do anything to cause it?”

“I am certain... Thank you.”

“For what?”

“For never being bothered by my... interruptions.” Fenris turned his head away from Hawke's neck to stare down at their knees. Hawke couldn't see his face clearly from that angle, but he could see the tips of his ears turn slightly red; they'd been regularly having sex for months but Fenris was still a little embarrassed whenever discussing the topic. He preferred, or rather he was used to, jumping into the act with little planning or discussion. It was a far cry from how Hawke did things, he liked spontaneous back-clawing sex as much as the next man but he liked “making love” just as much and it had been somewhat difficult getting Fenris to open up about what he liked and what he fantasised about. The shyness had been endearing at first, but when Fenris told him more about his past and he realized the silent behaviour was a learned one from his days as a slave rather than one of embarrassment and he simply wasn't USED to being given the option to give suggestions, he felt sick.  
Sometimes the fear, the discomfort, would come down on him again like he was back in Tevinter despite knowing full well he was safe in a bed in Hightown in the arms of the man he loved. When Fenris had told Hawke all this, Hawke had been horrified and wanted to stop the sex all together until the fear went away for good, but Fenris loved sex, and he loved the things Hawke did with him, and didn't want to cut that part of their relationship out. They quickly figured out a middle ground, fortunately; the more Fenris opted to use his right to say no, at any point, the less often these episodes would happen.

“It's not any trouble at all,” he assured the elf and affectionately ruffled his hair. “Just... Just promise you'll keep telling me what you like and when you have these... attacks of anxiety or whatever they are.”

“Attacks? It's not something so dramatic.”

“Well you don't look dramatic, but your face doesn't ever move. At any moment you could be screaming in terror and I wouldn't know it.”

“I am very expressive I'll have you know. Only yesterday I twitched an eyebrow.”

It took Hawke a moment to realize that Fenris was trying to lighten the mood. He grinned. “Your jokes are improving, love.”

“Good, I've been writing new material day and night.”

“In between making up dance routines?”

“I am a man of many talents.”


End file.
